I am going to be less exceptional at saying yes to the things I do not want to do, so that I can preserve my energy and creativity for what really calls to me.
By which I do not by any means indicate that I am an exceptional writer , but I will let go of the idea that everything I write needs to be exceptional any time I put pen to paper or finger to keyboard.
Thank you for this reminder! Sometimes the output will be pretty shite (for lack of a better word) but it does not mean the end.
I love the opportunity to think about this question. Thank you, Sarah.
I’m gonna be less exceptional about not staying in my lane for different responsibilities around our very busy household and all the different people that come in and out for different reasons. I’m gonna be less exceptional about not trusting people to complete their own jobs in a good enough fashion.
I’m going to be less exceptional about not swimming in the ocean
Great question I'm actually an ultra runner. Presently i'm working in San Francisco as an Occupational Health Nurse in a factory. I walk and ride my bike to work role modeling work life balance. I'm going to focus more on my yoga/Tai Chi and being less exceptional in my running.
Hmmm. I’m going to be less exceptional at caregiving. Read in a book by Maggie Smith that her therapist said caregiving in adult to adult relationships is a form of control. That resonated and has been sitting with me since. Looking forward to seeing what applying this to my relationships looks like.
Hmm. Thanks for replying, iFish. For me, this may be a yes/and. Of course taking care of each other is a beautiful fulfilling thing and part of any important relationship. I think caregiving in the way I mean here is adopting a specific role in a relationship where one is caring and one is cared for—which can mean not opening to one’s own needs and vulnerability, for one thing.
Having a boundary around her own needs, and getting them met while at the same time being receptive and offering the best we can of ourselves is a hard balance to arrive at my world
That I totally agree with, Holly. Caregivers can often neglect there own needs, and that can lead to burnout. So it's a great idea to be 'less exceptional' for a while. And I suppose some people MIGHT use caregiving as a form of control - but I thought that was a pretty cynical view of it on the whole. Blessings to you!
This is a difficult question, but I'm going to try to be less exceptional of being available 24/7 for every little request. I'm blessed to live in an area where it doesn't take long to be out of cell service, and I need to take advantage of that more often, especially lately.
I'm an author and freelance writer in Montana who loves to write about everything from planting garlic (as in today's post on my Substack page) to how not to be eaten by a bear.
Less exceptional at having to do everything "right."
Hello, I'm Kim and I'm a reformed workaholic, recovering CEO and writer of Life (un)Learned. You can probably guess, I'm having to unlearn all kinds of not so healthy habits...and writing about it as I go.
I'm going to be less exceptional at emotional strength because I am not strong on the inside. I'm in a difficult season of life and tend to numb or ignore my legitimate emotions because I fear letting myself feel them. This only prolongs the pain. I write "What Just Happened," which are raw faith-driven stories about navigating unexpected challenges.
I'm going to work on being less exceptional in filling my calendar to the brim with sports classes and activities (as part of my healing from betrayal trauma and a nerve issue). The movements and dopamine high got me addicted 😅. But I need to listen to my body when I can't push through. I'm Louisa, an editor and former health coach living in the Huson Valley of New York. I'm originally from Hong Kong.
There is that rush from heading from one event to another, isn't there? I do get a bit of a dopamine hit when I can time it perfectly and make it in the nick of time!
Yes, me too, Prajna! I find it hard when family’s visiting not to switch into autopilot tidy up mode. But I’m making a ‘note to self’ to hang back, especially where there are tasks that should be shared.
Sarah's group appeared in my inbox this morning and my thought was, "where did this come from?"
As I read your post Sarah, like Magdalena P., I thought I'd play along too. :)
I'm a commercial fisherwoman, daughter, sister, partner, friend, amongst other things, and now a health coach/alcohol free coach joyfully walking with myself and others on our paths of change.
This month I'll work on being less exceptional at getting my marketing right and going with the flow.
Your experience in commercial fishing caught my attention! That has to be a fascinating gig, but I love how you obviously see the big picture when it comes to overall health and living life well.
I recently stopped wearing a smart watch & tracking food, number of steps, heart rate when exercising, sleep quality, etc. -- because it was making me completely obsessive. I felt instantly calmer and More at peace. 😊
Later in life I’ve learned, as a therapist once told me, that “anything worth doing is worth doing badly.” This helps me try and do things I don’t yet have much skill in—without worrying about excelling.
I’d like to get back into a writing practice that is different from a write-to-post practice. And let myself suck at it. I’m Eliza, and I live in Vermont and write memoir based around my late parents’ art.
Factchecking. I'm kind of obsessed with it, even though a friend showed me how, when she "googles" facts, what she gets in her feed depends on which computer she's on. It's still an echo chamber, even when you think you are doing due diligence and looking at various websites for information. I've decided that I no longer want the Internet to shape my reality....so after Tuesday (sort of like I'll start my diet on Monday), I'm going to take a very long and very needed news and social media break (except for Substack, of course!)
Hard question but I’m going to play 😎. This month I’m going to be less exceptional (even writing this gives me hives!) in the area of saying Yes to people., things and opportunities. I’ve been trained to say yes first and then figure the rest out. This month I will start with Maybe and then figure it out. Im Magdalena Ponurska and I’m recovering perfectionist and overachiever. 🤣
I’m going to be less exceptional at not interrupting people. I was always taught to wait for someone to finish speaking before I talk, but if someone doesn’t stop talking, then I don’t get my chance. I love listening to people and hearing their stories, but I also need to share my own. Hi, I’m Carol from Minneapolis, MN - a quiet person in a noisy city.
Oh, Carol. I hear you. I grew up in Minneapolis, now live in St. Paul. Minnesota Nice is in the water supply, but strangely affects only some people. And not only in speaking! My Substack is Writer, interrupted. Good to meet you! We’ve had a couple of meet-ups; would love to meet you.
This week I will continue my recent efforts to be less exceptional at supporting and caring for an emotionally abusive family member.
I’m a fiction writer in Ames, Iowa still developing my Substack. My unwritten memoir is titled: “If you are reading this, my mother must be dead.”
I’ll be less exceptional at sitting on the couch. Movement is good!
Movement is great, Lisa Bolin, but you posted this at 1:21 am?! Sounds like you are moving something!
I don't think I'm in your time zone...
I'm going to be less exceptional at keeping up with emails!
Me too!
I am going to be less exceptional at saying yes to the things I do not want to do, so that I can preserve my energy and creativity for what really calls to me.
I like this, Amy Brown.
Yes!
I’m going to be less exceptional at writing.
By which I do not by any means indicate that I am an exceptional writer , but I will let go of the idea that everything I write needs to be exceptional any time I put pen to paper or finger to keyboard.
Thank you for this reminder! Sometimes the output will be pretty shite (for lack of a better word) but it does not mean the end.
Thank you all for all the support! It came well timed as I needed to be reminded of my own commitment 😂
Hooray, Katta Lyst!
That's so beautiful!
This is so wise! Taking note for myself.
I love the opportunity to think about this question. Thank you, Sarah.
I’m gonna be less exceptional about not staying in my lane for different responsibilities around our very busy household and all the different people that come in and out for different reasons. I’m gonna be less exceptional about not trusting people to complete their own jobs in a good enough fashion.
I’m going to be less exceptional about not swimming in the ocean
These are great!
Sarah,
Great question I'm actually an ultra runner. Presently i'm working in San Francisco as an Occupational Health Nurse in a factory. I walk and ride my bike to work role modeling work life balance. I'm going to focus more on my yoga/Tai Chi and being less exceptional in my running.
Hmmm. I’m going to be less exceptional at caregiving. Read in a book by Maggie Smith that her therapist said caregiving in adult to adult relationships is a form of control. That resonated and has been sitting with me since. Looking forward to seeing what applying this to my relationships looks like.
I support you in this, Holly!!
That's a tricky one but sounds very wise to me, Holly. Very provocative quote by Maggie Smith. Am pondering that.
Oh please don't listen to that! Caregiving is a wonderful, loving, selfless role... it's not controlling at all. What a sad view of it.
Hmm. Thanks for replying, iFish. For me, this may be a yes/and. Of course taking care of each other is a beautiful fulfilling thing and part of any important relationship. I think caregiving in the way I mean here is adopting a specific role in a relationship where one is caring and one is cared for—which can mean not opening to one’s own needs and vulnerability, for one thing.
Holly I hear you
Having a boundary around her own needs, and getting them met while at the same time being receptive and offering the best we can of ourselves is a hard balance to arrive at my world
Aw, to our striving for balance. May we find gentleness and grace for ourselves and all we offer bits of ourselves to. ♥️
Thanks, Prajna.
That I totally agree with, Holly. Caregivers can often neglect there own needs, and that can lead to burnout. So it's a great idea to be 'less exceptional' for a while. And I suppose some people MIGHT use caregiving as a form of control - but I thought that was a pretty cynical view of it on the whole. Blessings to you!
And to you too!!
I’m going to be less exceptional at trying to set world records for insomnia. I hear that sleep is good for you.
I wholly support this one.
Thank you, Amy.😴
And I hope you succeed, Mary! Sweet dreams.
Im going to be more exceptional at saying no to things and setting boundaries and less exceptional at people pleasing
Ditto!
I’m going to be less exceptional at consuming media and consumer goods. 😅 More time for movement.
Ah! I aim to be less exceptional at not being "exceptional" at anything.
Perfect!
Thanks for the thought prodder.
Not quite!
This is a difficult question, but I'm going to try to be less exceptional of being available 24/7 for every little request. I'm blessed to live in an area where it doesn't take long to be out of cell service, and I need to take advantage of that more often, especially lately.
I'm an author and freelance writer in Montana who loves to write about everything from planting garlic (as in today's post on my Substack page) to how not to be eaten by a bear.
That sounds like me, too, another Amy who wants to be less exceptional at saying yes!
How not to be eaten by a bear I love that
You'd be surprised of how many people don't give the bears enough space or consideration around here! 😆
So it’s a real thing in Montana? Very fascinating.
Sounds interesting! I would like to have some bear knowledge 😃
Maybe i need more coffee, but I really don't understand the question. Why would we want to be less exceptional?
It's worth thinking about. Why would we ever need to be exceptional at anything?
Less exceptional at having to do everything "right."
Hello, I'm Kim and I'm a reformed workaholic, recovering CEO and writer of Life (un)Learned. You can probably guess, I'm having to unlearn all kinds of not so healthy habits...and writing about it as I go.
Ooo, me too. It’s hard letting go of old work habits but I’m making progress.
I'm going to be less exceptional at emotional strength because I am not strong on the inside. I'm in a difficult season of life and tend to numb or ignore my legitimate emotions because I fear letting myself feel them. This only prolongs the pain. I write "What Just Happened," which are raw faith-driven stories about navigating unexpected challenges.
Wise, Patty. I know the feeling of trying to “win” at emotional strength. To feeling the feels. To not prolonging the pain.
I'm going to work on being less exceptional in filling my calendar to the brim with sports classes and activities (as part of my healing from betrayal trauma and a nerve issue). The movements and dopamine high got me addicted 😅. But I need to listen to my body when I can't push through. I'm Louisa, an editor and former health coach living in the Huson Valley of New York. I'm originally from Hong Kong.
With ya ❤️
There is that rush from heading from one event to another, isn't there? I do get a bit of a dopamine hit when I can time it perfectly and make it in the nick of time!
Ha ha! True that!
Thanks, Sarah. I’m going to be less exceptional at tidying up after other people! If they don’t see it, why should I?!
I’m in the UK and my Substack, Wendy’s World, covers memoir, arts, books, life.
Okay, I was trying to think of one for myself, and this is it. Stealing--I'm going to be less exceptional at this too!
Wendy, this is exactly what I have been working on. Sometimes my tidiness can make me a bit crazy because I do see everything.
Yes, me too, Prajna! I find it hard when family’s visiting not to switch into autopilot tidy up mode. But I’m making a ‘note to self’ to hang back, especially where there are tasks that should be shared.
Yes exactly
Sarah's group appeared in my inbox this morning and my thought was, "where did this come from?"
As I read your post Sarah, like Magdalena P., I thought I'd play along too. :)
I'm a commercial fisherwoman, daughter, sister, partner, friend, amongst other things, and now a health coach/alcohol free coach joyfully walking with myself and others on our paths of change.
This month I'll work on being less exceptional at getting my marketing right and going with the flow.
So glad you're here!
Your experience in commercial fishing caught my attention! That has to be a fascinating gig, but I love how you obviously see the big picture when it comes to overall health and living life well.
Thanks Amy! It has been a unique life for me! :)
I recently stopped wearing a smart watch & tracking food, number of steps, heart rate when exercising, sleep quality, etc. -- because it was making me completely obsessive. I felt instantly calmer and More at peace. 😊
It's so true. The numbers!
I hate it when my smartwatch tells me to stand. I know it’s right, but I hate being ordered around.
Yes! I used to be like that too! Literally tracking everything! But it wasn't good for me, wasn't healthy.
Maybe I should do that too. I'm obsessed over those things as well. :)
I’d like to be less exceptional at planning. Sometimes let’s just go with the flow.
My name is Barbara and I’m based in the incredibly energetic borough of Queens in New York City!
Non-planners baffle me. Let me know how it goes.
Cheers from a nonplanner, Barbara. Going with the flow has brought me to some fantastic places.
That said, I’m trying to be just a touch more plan-y. So maybe we meet in the middle. 😁🌉
Hi Holly! I hear there are fantastic views in the middle!
Clearing out my inbox 🙃I don’t have to answer every email immediately!
This made me breathe deeply. I've heard that we don't have to answer every email immediately. I have heard that.
Good question.
I love your new avatar! I love getting to see your face.
Glad somebody loves it 😂
Being comfortable ! As the weather changes and fluctuates and wrapping up the year
And the ever increasing task list and holiday
disruptions..... wow I feel better already !
Thanks Sarah!
Wonderful!
Later in life I’ve learned, as a therapist once told me, that “anything worth doing is worth doing badly.” This helps me try and do things I don’t yet have much skill in—without worrying about excelling.
I love that: Anything worth doing is worth doing badly.
I’d like to get back into a writing practice that is different from a write-to-post practice. And let myself suck at it. I’m Eliza, and I live in Vermont and write memoir based around my late parents’ art.
I'm doing that--it's soooo nice.
Factchecking. I'm kind of obsessed with it, even though a friend showed me how, when she "googles" facts, what she gets in her feed depends on which computer she's on. It's still an echo chamber, even when you think you are doing due diligence and looking at various websites for information. I've decided that I no longer want the Internet to shape my reality....so after Tuesday (sort of like I'll start my diet on Monday), I'm going to take a very long and very needed news and social media break (except for Substack, of course!)
Excellent idea! I'm on a mostly permanent break from those myself, Linda!
Hard question but I’m going to play 😎. This month I’m going to be less exceptional (even writing this gives me hives!) in the area of saying Yes to people., things and opportunities. I’ve been trained to say yes first and then figure the rest out. This month I will start with Maybe and then figure it out. Im Magdalena Ponurska and I’m recovering perfectionist and overachiever. 🤣
I can imagine this gives you hives, Magdalena! You're a go-getter.
Yes, Magdalena! Cheering you on in this very much-needed (and maybe difficult) endeavor. To saying yes to YOU!! ♥️
I’m going to be less exceptional at not interrupting people. I was always taught to wait for someone to finish speaking before I talk, but if someone doesn’t stop talking, then I don’t get my chance. I love listening to people and hearing their stories, but I also need to share my own. Hi, I’m Carol from Minneapolis, MN - a quiet person in a noisy city.
I love this, Carol: a quiet person in a noisy city. I'm rooting for you.
Thanks, Sarah. I appreciate that.
Oh, Carol. I hear you. I grew up in Minneapolis, now live in St. Paul. Minnesota Nice is in the water supply, but strangely affects only some people. And not only in speaking! My Substack is Writer, interrupted. Good to meet you! We’ve had a couple of meet-ups; would love to meet you.
For the sake of my sanity, working on the early stages of developing a novel.
I was thinking of you!